Vin Diesel and Muqtada Al Sadr Switcheroo
Few weeks ago I was browsing pictures on Aljazeera website of people in Gaza celebrating the Hamas win in Palestinian elections.
And low behold, what did I find?
What is Vin Diesel doing in Gaza celebrating the Hamas win?
Ok, Now that the American super hero is in Gaza, I feel optimistic. I am sure that he will just stair at the bad guys and they will all leave the country. And soon there will be peace in the middle east.
Now that Hollywood has contributed it bestest and finest to the middle east, I think that we in the middle east should reciprocate equally. And who better to contribute to the cause that our dear Muqtada Al Sader.
Now I know that you might be thinking that the dude is ugly and fat and what is he going to do in Hollywood.
But if the guy is this popular in Iraq while fat and ugly
Try to imagine how cool he will be once we send him to hollywood with a makeover, same basic dental work, a few trips to the gym and he will revolutionize the pop culture scene.
Yes I know he doesn't speak English, but hey!, he could always go for being a rapper where speaking English doesn't matter that much.
After all if Ice Cube can be a rapper and act in movies why can't Muqtada. At least Muqtada doesn't have to manufacture the bad boy image, it comes naturally to him. Just think of all the cool rapper music lyrics that Muqtada would come up with.
My last name means chest
and my father was Ayutullah
That makes me the wrong Iraqi to mess with.
Under Saddam I didn't dare fart
Now that Amerikkka came I brandish the AK
I am comin
I am comin
I am comin
to Amerikkka
I got Mehdi army behind me
Arrest warrents ... I ignore
They all know not to mess with Muqtada
My AK is ready to rip
Slapped in my banana clip
Pump seventeen rounds make his brains hang out
I am rockin
I am rockin
I am rockin
to Amerikkka
Try to imagine the movie "XXX - State of the Union" starring Muqtada instead of Ice Cube, it would have made an entertaining watch, instead of the dull pukekoramma that it is.
[Disclaimer, the first picture is not really of Vin Diesel, it is just some dude in Gaza who looks like him]
And low behold, what did I find?
What is Vin Diesel doing in Gaza celebrating the Hamas win?
Ok, Now that the American super hero is in Gaza, I feel optimistic. I am sure that he will just stair at the bad guys and they will all leave the country. And soon there will be peace in the middle east.
Now that Hollywood has contributed it bestest and finest to the middle east, I think that we in the middle east should reciprocate equally. And who better to contribute to the cause that our dear Muqtada Al Sader.
Now I know that you might be thinking that the dude is ugly and fat and what is he going to do in Hollywood.
But if the guy is this popular in Iraq while fat and ugly
Try to imagine how cool he will be once we send him to hollywood with a makeover, same basic dental work, a few trips to the gym and he will revolutionize the pop culture scene.
Yes I know he doesn't speak English, but hey!, he could always go for being a rapper where speaking English doesn't matter that much.
After all if Ice Cube can be a rapper and act in movies why can't Muqtada. At least Muqtada doesn't have to manufacture the bad boy image, it comes naturally to him. Just think of all the cool rapper music lyrics that Muqtada would come up with.
My last name means chest
and my father was Ayutullah
That makes me the wrong Iraqi to mess with.
Under Saddam I didn't dare fart
Now that Amerikkka came I brandish the AK
I am comin
I am comin
I am comin
to Amerikkka
I got Mehdi army behind me
Arrest warrents ... I ignore
They all know not to mess with Muqtada
My AK is ready to rip
Slapped in my banana clip
Pump seventeen rounds make his brains hang out
I am rockin
I am rockin
I am rockin
to Amerikkka
Try to imagine the movie "XXX - State of the Union" starring Muqtada instead of Ice Cube, it would have made an entertaining watch, instead of the dull pukekoramma that it is.
[Disclaimer, the first picture is not really of Vin Diesel, it is just some dude in Gaza who looks like him]
There is a way between voice and presence where information flows.
In disciplined silence it opens.
With wandering talk it closes. .... Rumi
3:57 AMWas wrong wif fat 'n ugly? Lot of big rappers do well, plus, Elvis was no coat-hanger when he quit the scene. In fact, Sadr still has a bit of puppy fat on him, just like Elvis used to. I'm tempted to go for the boy-band look with him, rather then a rapper make-over.
9:43 AM
That's hillarious. I love the idea.
Actually, we can send him to "queer eye to the Maqty guy" program.
Thank you for making me laugh :-)
5:07 AM
Dear Ihath and readers,
If Muqtada starred in a Hollywood movie, would we see his fans marching around with large portraits in front of the movie theaters? Or would they imitate the Trekkies and merely dress and make-up like him and wait in long lines to be the first to get tickets for opening night? Would they be called Muckies?
My favorite portrait of Muck is the one where it appears (from a distance, without my reading glasses on) that he is sticking his finger up his nose while looking very serious.
Which reminds me about seeing that snippet of pathetic Saddam (in court) on TV last night. Stalin and Mao each killed millions of their own nations' citizens to preserve their dictatorships. Like them, Saddam puts his pants on one leg at a time. These evil men are simply men like us, and they can do nothing without the help and cooperation of others.
Pray for the Iraqis. They have to make extremely difficult choices now.
Later...
7:53 AM
You'd be surprised at how far "Fat and Ugly" can take you.
Ron Jeremy, for example.
9:49 PM
Or Jorge Garcia (www.lost-tv.com/cast/garcia.html) of "Lost." Although I actually think he's kinda cute. But that Naveen Andrews -- now HE'S a hunk!
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